maro Lip Schtick: Oh, honey! You <em>shouldn't</em> have ...p

Tuesday, February 15, 2005

Oh, honey! You shouldn't have ...

I'm always appreciative when fellow bloggers and anonymous readers check in with Lip Schtick to see what's up in my world. So, needless to say, I was happy that some of you felt my pain as I waxed philosophical about a few fashion no-nos that really get under my skin.

One such bloggist had a quandary for LilRed (don't you hate it when people refer to themselves in the third person?) in reference to a gift she received yesterday from her main squeeze for Valentine's Day. I knew I had to use the question for a follow-up post.

Chevy Rose asks:
Where the h*ll do I wear a sweater covered in red hearts, ribbons, sequins received last night from romantic old hubby? Any advice? I'm thinking my funeral.

Well, Chevy. I'm glad you asked, as I believe I can be of some assistance here.

My thoughts initially are that the sweater to which you refer (and, by the way, I wish I could have been there to see your expression when you pulled it out of its wrapping) is probably a little too flashy for you to be buried in. I would suggest a nice suit with perhaps an heirloom brooch for your last rites.

Perhaps there was something about the sweater, in all its garish glory, that kindled a spark in your husband from early in your courtship. Who knows?

But, since most men are driven by the needs of the dumbstick, I suggest that you wear the sweater in the boudoir, preferably with nothing else.

You see, Chevy, this methodology will help you kill two birds with one sequin.

First, you'll have the pleasure of knowing you're making your husband happy by wearing the garment ... regardless of how heinous ... that he picked out especially for you. And second, by employing this tactic, you won't actually have to wear the sweater in public.

Also, you'll be doing him a favor by showing him that you love him so much that you want to wear the sweater, and more importantly, that you're willing to get your groove on with him in spite of the tacky thing (which is really at the root of most men's actions anyway).

I hope this helps, Chevy. Be sure to keep me posted.

Anyone else out there have a problem that needs LilRed's (I know, there's that third person thing again) attention?

The doctor is in.


Blogger Chevy Rose said...

I really appreciate your quick response and am relieved for your advice, since I basically did exactly that....sort of. I worn it to our office yesterday. He was absolutely delighted when I walked in wearing it. I was wearing it over a shell, and when he left for an appointment I hung it in the closet.
I did make one error on way to office. I had to stop for gas. When I stepped out of my car, I think I caused a small fender-bender. The women were staring at me, I think.
Now it's wrapped in tissue in bottom chest drawer. It is a 'treasure' to me, since it's always possible that it's his last V-gift to me, considering our age.

7:49 AM  
Blogger LilRed said...

Ahh, Chevy, you sound like a really sweet lady!

If it's any consolation, it sounds like you and your hubby still have a wonderful, loving relationship - one that most people only dream of. A less-than-pleasing-to-the-eye Valentine's Day gift won't change that.

And as far as this possibly being your last Valentine's Day gift, I certainly hope not.

Thanks for being such a good sport about my post. It was all in good fun. Maybe my silly advice will help other women in similar situations to yours (after all, there are a lot of men out there who need help in the gift-giving department).

And by the way ... maybe the ladies you "ran into" at the gas station were just jealous! They probably wished they had a Valentine themselves.

8:51 AM  
Anonymous dstew said...


i had to laugh at your dumbstick referrence. i've never heard that before, and it is very funny...and oh yes, accurate ;-)

10:35 AM  
Blogger Chevy Rose said...

UPDATE: I've posted a photo of the "LOVE" sweater on my blog. Take a quick peek.

7:44 PM  
Blogger OKPartisan said...

I do believe, LilRed, that you are destined for blogging glory. And Chevy, I have to say I admire your dogs if not your sweater.

9:57 PM  
Blogger LilRed said...

dstew - I appreciate a guy who doesn't try to act like he's NOT driven by the dumbstick. I mean, c'mon! We all know better! Some men are just better at hiding it than others.

Chevy - Thanks for letting me know about the picture. I can honestly admit that it is not as bad as what the mental image I had conjured up!

OKPartisan - Thanks for the huge compliment!

9:01 AM  

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