maro Lip Schtick: Ornament lamentp

Saturday, December 17, 2005

Ornament lament

A few gal pals invited me to a dinner / ornament exchange party a couple of weeks ago.

I set out shopping for my ornament. And what I came to realize is this:

Ornaments are tacky. Tacky as hell, as a matter of fact.

Have you ever noticed this? I mean, collectively, when displayed on a Christmas tree, they all look great.

But when you break them down, one by one, they are not so cute. The funky colors ... garish, actually.

And what's worse, most of them are so fragile that you can't look at them without breaking them. So then you've got jacked up ornaments with eyes, arms, and various other limbs missing.

So next year I think I'll try something different. A tree without ornaments.

On second thought, no.

Because even whacked out broken ornaments are better than nothing.

Even if they do look like rejects from the Dolly Parton house of fine jewels.


Anonymous Bug said...

Oy vey I agree with you. I went out to see about getting new ornaments...totally disgusted. Everything looked so chintzy on the racks. Maybe if they would display them on a tree in the store they would have looked better. (And I did get a dress...just waiting for the pictures to come back *grins*)

9:39 AM  
Anonymous The Incurable Insomniac said...

Ideas for decorations that I've seen:

1) Hot glue tiny red ribbons on wine corks. (Use the ribbons as hangers.)

2) Sunglasses. (Hey, it was California...)

3) Fake (feathered) birds. (One tree I saw had nothing but cardinals on it, while another had all kinds and colors.)

4) Little pine cones spray painted gold and hung with gold metallic thread.

5) Candy canes and sugar cookies.

I admit that I like the sungalsses..

11:07 AM  
Blogger nicole said...

Then these people must not be trading the COOL ornaments. Dude, I've got the cutest hanging tchotchkes you ever did see!

I've got the Care Bears, Strawberry Shortcake, Hello Kitty, Garfield and Yukon Cornelius...and even a soundbite Frosty! Kick. Ass.

11:06 PM  

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